Olympics

Negaunee Michigan is home to the only natural luge track in the US.

Negaunee Michigan is home to the only natural luge track in the US.:

Natural luge tracks are tracks that are used for naturbhan (from the German “natural track”) luge competitions. Tracks are often located along mountain roads and paths. The track surface is made of packed snow and ice, with a slope of not more than 1.5%. Unlike it’s Olympic counterpart “kunstbahn” (artificial track) luge, natural tracks are to be adapted to the natural conditions and artificial refrigeration and banking are prohibited.

The summer Olympics should be split into Spring, Summer and Fall Olympics.

Congratulations to Team Dagobah, winners of Olympic gold in the lightsaber fencing competition. Mighty you have competed.

If synchronized swimming is an Olympic event, Air guitar should be one too.

If synchronized swimming is an Olympic event, Marco Polo should be one too.

Congratulations to Germany! Winners of Olympic gold in the schadenfreude competition.

Next up, this year’s Olympic Funny Walk competition.

Much favored England takes the gold at this year’s Olympic Quidditch competition. A round of butterbeer for everyone.

Next up olympic synchronized texting and the freestyle duck face mirror picture competition.

Nine foot tall, seven armed North Korean Olympic athlete denies genetic manipulation charges.

Congratulations to district 12, winner of this year’s olympic hunger games gold medal. Extra groosling for everyone!

Next up, competitive Beer Pong, Germany versus Belgium. Talking about the origin of the beer, not the countries.

Stunning upset in this years olympic Shurik competition as Uzbekistan defeats Kazakhstan 3 dogs to 2. Great success!

Congratulations to the medal winners of this year’s olympic 1000 mile freestyle schlep. Iit didn’t kill you to visit Nana.

Congratulations to the survivors of this year’s olympic javelin catch competition, you did great guys. Lets hope you make it to the 2016 olympics in one piece.

Next up, olympic competitive eating! Go team USA. Glut-to-ny! Glut-to-ny!